Tonight a bunch of my cast mates squeezed in the living room to watch the MTV Video Music Awards. Personally, I have never watched an award show from start to finish – they simply don’t interest me, just like parades… I don’t get the fascination with parades. When I expressed my lack of interest in watching the VMA’s to my homegirl Lea, she coaxed me into partaking in the festivities because watching award ceremonies are so much more fun with friends. She painted a lovely picture and in three short weeks we will be going our separate ways, so I made an awesome dinner and sat down with these new friends of mine to watch the VMA’s. It was definitely a fun time but as the program progressed, I kept asking everyone “who is that?” or “what song is that?” quickly realizing that I am completely out of the loop when it comes to what the kids are listening to these days.
I watched as these young teens and young adult perform their number one hits and receive their accolades for the diligence and hard work. It truly made me smile and feel good on the inside. I always admire people that know what they want to do with their lives and never deviate from their path. To be so young and successful really shows focus and commitment to a single goal. I definitely deviated and took multiple turns to end up back where I started, which was on the stage. There are moments when my mind drifts and asks “what if I never stopped performing” or “what if I kept auditioning and decided not to go to college” etc, where would that Tamala look like or where would she be. It is very fleeting when it happens these days (thankfully) and my mind slipped there today while listening to various acceptance speeches. If I am so blessed, my wildest dreams will manifest and the icing on the cake would be that I would be recognized for my hard work by my peers in the form of some award – if that ever happens I won’t be a tender 23 years old. And you know what? I am totally okay with that because I am learning so much about who I am.
I am stronger. Wiser. More confident. I can only imagine the type of pressure celebrities deal with and I am sure it is even harder when you’re in your late-teens/early 20s. The world is your oyster but it’s also so new and foreign…. and when you’re learning anything new you have to practice at it – and in this case, I am getting practice at learning how to live my life in private… make my mistakes, discover exactly how to use my gifts for the greater good. It’s wonderful! The Universe is always working together for our greater good… humbly doing it’s part to co-create the best lives imaginable.
Kate Walsh known from her role on Grey’s Anatomy and then Private Practice says it to wonderfully in an article in Harpers Bazaar: “Everyone wants instant gratification. But success is that much sweeter when you’re all grown up. My age gives me perspective and the confidence to speak out about things, to embrace change, and the courage to take risks. The best part is that I know I’m just getting started. I’ve learned over and over that life happens on its own terms, not mine.”
I couldn’t agree with her more and I am so thankful that there are women like here around that I can look up to. I can’t force God to give me what I want when I want it, but I can make sure the Divine is crystal clear about my intentions by being persistent, working hard, never giving up and living in faith that it will all work out better than okay.